I’m Sorry

When another girl sent your boyfriend “I miss you”, wouldn’t you be pissed off?

I logged in to Facebook this afternoon using my boyfriend’s account and saw that there was an unopened message. The message was from a girl, his former classmate, telling him that she misses him. Of course, I got mad. I told my boyfriend that I am angry but he also got angry with me.

OK, I know I overreacted. But really, I think I only reacted the way a girlfriend should react.

I hate it when he gets too close to his classmates. I hate to know that he enjoys their company more than mine. I get mad when another girl touches him, texts him about anything that is not school-related.

The problem is I believe I started all these. I broke up with him and he started to go out with his classmates. From then onwards, he got close to them. 

If only I can turn back time.

I messed up. Now, I have to understand that he doesn’t wholly belong to me anymore, that he already has this circle of friends. It’s not anymore like before when I was the only one he tells his problems to, the only one with whom he can be himself. All I can think of now is how unfair this situation is. Because I am still the same me. My world revolves around him and him only. 

I never ceased to love him. God knows that. I never stopped caring. But why do I feel like I’m not his everything anymore?

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